The Cynical Optimist

Dear world. The older I get, the more I realize how corrupted you are. When I look at you from a political standpoint, I see corruption. I go down to the urban level and my face is drenched deep in blood and smoke.

Let’s face it. Things aren’t going as one would plan. You got people suspicious of our own government nuking the double towers. You got Iran’s president/government threatening to rape us in the ass, and you got North Korea. Need I even say anything about North Korea? As if that weren’t enough, we got Bin Ladin and Al Queda pissed off at us for…[insert reasons here].

Dear world, you are ever so corrupt. I’m a different person from what I was last year, or the year before, or the year before that (and continue on). But I realize now that you stood the same from the dawn of time. Always the foundation for war, corruption, and so on.

I worry sometimes that I may perish and miss the chance to make a difference in the world. I could hit rockbottom and die, and no one would know or care except the few loved ones that come to an individual naturally, whether it’s parents, uncles, etc. So what is my goal? To make an impact… to have people point at my grave and say “this is Robert. He did this, or this. Or that. And he’ll be remembered.” Let’s face it. Even presidents die and they’re forgotten unless you count the fact that little kids will eventually read about them in some stupid history book. That doesn’t cut it.

One can only do so much to end the corruption in this world. If anything the greatest thing a man can do is lessen its severity. Something I plan to attempt in the future. As of now I’m sitting on my ass and doing nothing about it, probably because I’m expected to fulfill other expectations such as receiving a useless general education, which, let’s face it, will probably be useless for the most part in the real world. I mean, who gives a fuck about the cosine of theta? Maybe architects. I know some will judge me and claim that I’m incorrect, that knowing the cosine of theta is actually useful. I disagree.

I have this philosophy that the world operates on “The Truth.” I have faith, but I believe in absolute truth. Truth to me could be the result of fate or an entity tied to destiny. It’s hard to explain–just part of the conscience in one form or another, I suppose. Example… tomorrow raining will be bad luck for many people, as they’ll get wet and sick. Some may enjoy the rain, whether it’s the natural beauty it possesses or the mere fact that it will quench the thirst of the thirsty. Haha, the “thirst of the thirsty.” I like that.

I realize that every time I start a new paragraph, I start a new topic along with it. An unrelated paragraph, even, which may have nothing to do with the preceding statements above it. But this isn’t an English class assignment. This is a compilation of my thoughts, and of things I have thought about in the past and things I’m thinking about right now.

Dear world. You are ever so corrupt.

- Robert R.
March 15, 2006.